Following

Am I running, running away? Yes, in fact, running away is the guilt that pulls at me, saying I’m weak.

That home, that city, was full of ghosts, a lifetime of family memories that now haunt and pain me. There was no joy at the beginning of the day. No motivation to engage. The surrounding beauty had tarnished in my eyes. Screams filled the void left by death. A soul sinking further into the abyss with each passing moment.

So run I did… I chased life wherever I sensed it could be found. And this… this one resolute guide, is strength. A great strength that pulled me from the depths, that alludes but pulls as a magnet to the stable force of life.

And what a force of nature the pull of life has proven for me. I now am in a home of joy, peace, and shining beauty. A community of smiles and love. A city of fun, satisfying opportunity. In watching the sunrises, my being fills with God. The gleam of those first rays fill my heart with peace… contentment.. joy.

My God is a miraculous being… breathing the force of life in and around us. I’ve often wondered how God leads, as I don’t see him with a staff marching ahead of me, no pillar of smoke by day and fire by night. And now I know… this force of life has led me naturally, instinctively to healing, peace, joy, life.

So I now release all guilt that accuses I ran away. This running will be reframed as following… following healing… following peace… following joy… following life… following God.

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